Fear one another


People fear people. Why? There must be more than a few reasons.

Could one of them be fear of losing? If so, what we afraid of losing? Rights? Status? Possessions? Not having what we desire, maybe. 

But what do we desire? More privileges? Better status or more possessions? Is the biggest fear of losing that of losing what we already have, or is it that of not having what we desire?

I have a pen – I don’t fear losing it. I have a shirt, too – I don’t fear losing that either. I have some kind of status on wordpress – or had, haha :) – I don’t exactly fear losing it, but I do desire a better one, a better status.

But where does fear of people come in play then? Luckily for me, it’s non-existent. But if I were, say, a business guy and I wanted to increase in ranks, but the one thing to stop me was my “competitor”, then the situation is somewhat different. If I fear not getting what I want, and this opposite person is the one thing in my way, the one symbol for failure, then yes – I might have a slight fear of him. But only because of the desire in me – not really anything to do with him.

Back to the point.

I have tiny bit of money, but I don’t exactly fear losing them. But losing my money would be a shame, though, because of the intentions and therefore desires I have for using them, or having them at least.  

Again, if I was to have a LOT of money I might grow a slight fear of losing them. (It always starts with a slight fear, I think – and without training of the mind this fear grows with time) More on that later.

So with a lot of money, most people in our culture would have a fear of losing it. This is maybe the most common reason for us to fear one another – money. With them come always thieves, and they are everywhere – on the street, at work, in the school and in the government.

More reasons to fear people. But again it is noteworthy to note that this fear does not come from the thieves themselves, the people around us. It comes from within. I like formulas: Desire –> fear of losing –> fear of thieves/people.

 Affection

Let’s say I have affection for some of my posessions. Be it a necklace, jacket or an inherited wristwatch. Would I fear that they could be gone tomorrow? Remember, these objects are kind of a part of my personality. Losing them could be a huge punch to my whole being. (at least some people out there feels that way). Maybe I would. But what excatly is it that I fear? The items are items no matter what, but the fact that I feel affection for them, that they are close to my heart means that they are.. what? personal items? Could it be that I fear losing my personality? That I hold on to certain items because I am insecure of my self? Afraid of losing the individuality in me in this messy culture maybe?

Can our personality really be lost through the loss of certain items? I think not.

Interesting thought.

 

This post was longer than expected. I will therefore ask you nicely to read nr. 2, (my next post) to stay with me for my point of all this.

 

As always – thanks for reading :)

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6 thoughts on “Fear one another

  1. shreejacob says:

    Very good points you made! The thing is we grow too attached to external things, even to people. We seem to think that the external world defines us…but it doesn’t. We have what we need within us …that is what makes us who we are. But it’s something that most of us have grown up with so shedding that takes time…and a lot of thought too!

  2. Krystal! says:

    :) Interesting read. I gave it some thought, and in my case, personal items–things I hold to be more personally significant–aren’t really things I have invested my personality in, so much as things that evoke certain feelings (affection, as you say). Memories included.

    I tried to think of a precious item–something that I know the location of at all times, that I store very well or (conversely) put on proud display, and that I would be pained to lose. Honestly, it was a bit difficult to say for sure what I really, really treasure, and what I just had fond associations with (gifts, items of accomplishment, etc).

    But when I thought of items I had already lost–a bracelet a mentor gave to me, my half of a best friends necklace pair–then my thoughts became clearer.

    In my case, the pain comes from a feeling of having disrespected or shown ingratitude toward the relationship associated with the aforementioned lost items. I still have not told my best friend that I lost that necklace, and unless it comes up in conversation, I probably won’t.

    But at the same time, I’m not sure I ever felt a conscious fear of losing those things, because their preciousness was not as clear to me while they were in my possession.

    Now that I think some more though, there are other items I love in different ways. For example, things that I bought for myself or that mark a particular change in my life. Then there are books, movies, games, and music, which I treasure in a very different way. I take particular care with a series of books that I grew up with and that influence a lot of who I am today. For them, you could maybe say they’re part of my personality, but my fear of losing or damaging them isn’t fear of losing part of my personality. Maybe you could say it’s like preserving a personal history.

    I almost want to say that keeping items of personal significance is like building a sort of shrine. Maybe it’s less materialism and more a desire to show love and respect, and to have those feelings housed in a tangible, visible object.

    (I really didn’t intend to write this much, but it is an interesting subject, and I suppose this post is like a digital offering of gratitude, because you left me an encouraging comment ages ago on a post that just said “I don’t know what to write.” :P Thanks for that!)

  3. Interesting thought, indeed. I am curious to read more about your “musings” on this. :)

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